November 2009
1 post
gah
I can’t believe people still look at this blog. I should probably delete it, eh?
If you are someone, follow this instead. This blog is dead and all entries should be regarded as fiction.
October 2009
15 posts
Goodbye Borgabear!
I was caught dead in the middle. While thinking about deleting all the entries that had been about you. (I feel it is neccesary to do all this before I finally move on. I need to get you out of my system!)
;I realized something, deleting all those entries would mean deleting more than half the amount of this blog. It makes me sad. This blog is so full of hate and sadness, because of you. It is...
No one really knows this blog.
& I intend to keep it that way.
Its secrecy is what makes this blog so powerful. The same way words that are never spoken, mean so much when they are.
Don’t make me move!
from ashes to ashes.
My biological clock is fucked.
It’s been fucked for days, since the semestral break had started.
So yesterday I had made the effort to finally fix my sleeping problem by not sleeping the entire day! It’s the one solution that always works for me, since I am not a selective sleeper.
6pm, just when I was about to doze off, Carlo and Aidz come knocking on our gate, screaming out my...
conversations with ex
Miguel Borja: have you ever sensationalized anything about us?
X: of course!
Miguel Borja: hahaha. do you make me look good?
Miguel Borja: my ex was super sexy
Miguel Borja: parang ganon
X: it depends on my mood
Miguel Borja: ok. i will allow it
X: why thank you
Miguel Borja: as long as it makes me look good
X: when i'm in a good mood you're this sweet, sensitive artist
X: when i'm not, you're the douche who pushes all the wrong buttons
Miguel Borja: I can't help it. i always say what i feel. and it gets me in a lot of trouble
X: that's the problem. ako rin kasi ganon e
X: it is why we argue
my ex has a weird way of making me feel that I am...
X: well, i need to shop
Miguel Borja : girls need to shop, i know
X: it keeps my insecurities from driving a knife into my stomach
X: OH JUST TODAY
X: it was wonderful! i went to powerplant and bought this dress that i spotted last wednesday in trinoma
X: tapos yung bobong babae sa zara sabi wala na raw yung size ko kahit saan
X: of course i didn't believe her so i went to powerplant anyway and there it was
X: and then i had my nails done at this amazing nail spa
X: ang saya lang
X: tomorrow i'm going to the mega tent sale near st. paul for topshop
X: OH SORRY
X: forgot you were a guy who doesn't care
X: sorry ang saya ko lang talaga
Miguel Borja: hahaha ok lang noh
Miguel Borja: oo nalang ako ng oo
X: you know, you're about the only guy i know who doesn't mind female blabber
X: the other dudes are just douchebags
X: i mean, you can be a douche as well, but overall, you are less douche-y than most guys
Miguel Borja: i'm still a douche though
X: yep!
Miguel Borja: not that i don't care. i just don't get shopping
X: perhaps i wouldn't love it so much if i didn't actually need it
Miguel Borja: stop being too insecure. you look good hahaha. parang nung hs lang, furniture is a good enough vice. hahah. pero kung payat lang din ako, i would shop
X: thanks! i know this! i like to think i'm on the better end of the physical spectrum, of course
X: but clothes don't hurt
X: furniture?
Miguel Borja: di ba addicted ka rin sa furniture
X: i guess noon yon
Miguel Borja: hahaha. mas ok na yung clothes
X: you remember things about me that even i don't remember!
X: grabe lang
the worst feeling is the non-feeling kind
I am falling for a girl who I don’t have feelings for anymore.
All because you couldn’t save me.
Is that so wrong?
I still don’t know much above love. Maybe it’s because I’ve liked so many girls, but have only loved so few. And you were one of them.
I don’t know what to do with all the unsent letters, the drawings, etc. They kept me sane for awhile. I had...
Tara, Tagaytay tayo?!
I love my friends.
I love my friends to death!
I love my friends because they are spontaneous.
Imagine the setting: dorm, after an episode of Walt Disney’s Alice in Wonderland, I ask if anyone’s had dinner yet. Someone suggests Kowloon, someone suggests Bahay.
Tara, Tagaytay tayo!
I don’t even remember who suggested it, but it seemed like a very good idea to pass out on....
love>hate
I have a love-hate relationship with blogs.
But I will not give up on this one.
This blog will see better days, I promise.
perhaps this is the ending I deserve
Tonight was a real eye-opener.
Let’s just say I did a stupid thing, but sometimes a stupid mistake is what it takes for people to learn. Learn from your mistakes, she says. But the truth is, I have not been learning because for the past couple of months, my heart has not been willing to learn.
Move on…
Tonight made me realize one thing about moving on. Besides the fact that it takes...
things will get better
I need to move on
Is this really the right time for thesis?
I am feeling guilty.
While thousands of people have lost their homes, I am at home worrying about my thesis and my heart. Is this really the right time for thesis? Is this really the right time to worry about my heart when so many others have stopped beating?
While I have made various efforts to help my friends, I feel as though I have not helped enough strangers. This month is “help a...
delubyo week
I am in Makati right now, with my sibs and cousins. We are staying here temporarily until the streets are safe.
Marikina is a ghost town.
This week has been a long one. Me and the LTS group got stranded in Antipolo due to the heavy flood and landslides. I got lucky, needless to say. We had food and electricity the whole weekend. Others were not as lucky. It makes me sad to think about the week...
September 2009
14 posts
the thing about wishes is...
I just woke up from Two days of Sleeplessness and spontaneity. Yesterday morning, I had decided to accompany Carlo to look for carving tools in Paete, Laguna. I was out of the house by 3am and we drove and arrived there at around 6am to hear mass and to visit the Church.
There’s this tradition that whenever you visit a Church you haven’t visited before, you knock three times on its...
stars tell truth.
“You are going through a high energy period, Pisces, and it may feel like there is nothing you can not accomplish right now. When it comes to matters of the heart however, you have been putting your energy in the wrong direction. If it feels like you are having a tough time getting anything done romantically, this is because your energy has been placed in an area where little to no progress...
timing is everything
There comes a time in people’s lives, when they meet the right person. & everything just feels right. Until one of them says the right words at the completely wrong time. Then suddenly, everything seems wrong, but the problem is you don’t remember how you lived your life before you met this person, because this person changed your life so much that she doesn’t even realize...
“It is easier to find men who will volunteer to die, than to find those who are...”
– Julius Caesar
"are you happy with your life?"
Something’s missing.
roof-hoppers
I had a dream about dad.
We were roof-hopping. Jumping from one roof to another.
I have no idea what it means, but I miss that man.
I haven’t seen him for several years now. Last time was when he was stalking me during my highschool graduation. Now that I look back, he must’ve really loved me.
I hope he knows that I love him too.
true love
I may have stopped trying.
I may have stopped hoping.
But I have never stopped feeling.
Perhaps, this is the way some people are meant to live their lives. It is a life that revolves around an unconditional love for that one person that they can never have. Maybe, I have accepted the fact that this will be the way I live mine. It is not a loveless kind of life, but a selfless one.
What better...
straight lines over circles
Perhaps the most ultimate goal of man is death.
I learned this while I was having one of my late night to early morning talks with Carlo. I am blessed to have someone to talk to because it is in these moments that I realize a lot about myself.
There are two kinds of people:
Those who plan to live
and Those who live to die.
Those who plan to live spend all their lives delaying the inevitable....
I miss him.
She’s right. Maybe its time to end it. Maybe its time to end this charade. Maybe its time to be “professional”, whatever that word means. Maybe its time to put aside these intentions and start wishing and hoping for better days ahead. To start facing problems as they come, to solve them when they are meant to be solved.
But for all its worth, I did my best.
I miss the old me....
piggy and panda dieeee! WTH
O_O: m2log ka na!
O_O: pig go sleep early
Miguel Borja: at may ddownload
Miguel Borja: ayoko
Miguel Borja: haha
O_O: pig
Miguel Borja: what panda?
O_O: piggy ka
Miguel Borja: panda ka
Miguel Borja: alam ko piggy na ako
Miguel Borja: diet na
O_O: me too
O_O: pnda fat
Miguel Borja: panda fat like a pig!
big time change is coming!
These past few months and weeks have been the slowest in my life. I guess its just me waking up to the realization of something big about to happen.
Big time change is coming! and no one’s ready for it.
I will miss everyone :(
The truth is, I still don’t know what my life will be after college. Whether or not i’ll get to see all these amazing people after everything...
August 2009
5 posts
i am happy.
Wow.
It’s been a while since this tumblr has seen any activity at all.
I think it’s mainly because i’ve been shying away from writing down anything too serious that I might probably regret in the future. I’ve been through that, and it brings a lot of pain.
I think I am ready to take the next step. Forgiveness, forgiving and being forgiven. I understand now, and I am...
:(
I really want to take your advice. I really want to take it slow. I really want to focus on what is happening right now. Being friends. But you’re making it hard for me when you tell me i’ll never get a chance.
what's wrong with me?
I am starting to realize, maybe its got everything to do with me :(
old shells
I always feel older whenever I get home from highschool reunion. I guess we’re just not getting any younger. I am finding out that as each highschool reunion comes and goes, I feel more and more aloof with these people. Its either I am finding out that I have little in common with them afterall, or I myself have changed a lot. Have I changed? Have they changed? We are all growing our...
July 2009
11 posts
“I know a girl
She puts the color inside of my world
But she’s just like...”
– john mayer, “daughters”
These are the best days of my life.
I am now the saddest and happiest i’ve ever been in my life. I don’t even know how that’s possible, but it is.
For one, being at the dorm has been a blast! Our line-up is complete and everyday feels like a How I Met Your Mother sitcom, only more x-rated. (Kidding.) Let me enumerate the stereotypes.
Pedz & Lesly: (the LQ couple)
Raffy: (the game-for-anything ...
Conversations with the ceiling.
My heart can’t help but break every night. But i’m moving on.
Why I don't play basketball.
It feels like 3rd grade all over again.
Me and my friends are playing a casual game of basketball. I had grown to like the sport, but I clearly wasn’t the best at it. The score is tied. There are ten seconds left in the game, and someone passes me the ball!
I don’t know what to do! The ball feels cold in my hands.
I am the biggest clutz in the world.
I am clumsy with my words,...
“There is no polite way to break someone’s heart.”
June 2009
4 posts
It will come.
It’s been a while since I last blogged. The truth is, i’ve been busy with a lot of things. School, painting,etc.
I just finished a 7x11 ft. mural for my friend’s coffee shop along E. Rodriguez. The place is called Taza de Kape. (pictures soon.) The commision helped in paying for our dorm, which is still a mess because of said painting. Irony.
& i’ve been busy...
The Monoblock incident.
I should have punched that guy in the face
I really should have.
Last night me and a few college friends were out drinking some place along Xavierville Ave. We had been there a few hours or so, but just when we were about ready to leave, a guy from the table beside us hurls a monoblock chair at one of my friends.
This guy (which shall henceforth be known as guy who looks like a duck) was...